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Honour the fallen, but not with this ersatz emotion

5/8/2014

3 Comments

 
Picture
Did you turn out the lights between 10 and 11 last night? Did you leave a single lamp burning? If so, was this a deliberate act of remembrance or the usual bedtime routine?
Yesterday was the 100th anniversary of the start of the First World War. Today is the 30th anniversary of Richard Burton's death (the actor, not the explorer). Tomorrow is the 125th anniversary of the opening of the Savoy. 

Anniversary mania is a condition that had historically been controlled by keeping the features department in quarantine. But then along came open-plan offices and dodgy air conditioning units and before you knew it, the disease had become endemic in newspaper offices and quickly spread to all areas of public life.
Every decade after every slightly significant advance had to be marked with a book, an interview, a film, a television special (backed up with another book).

The American bicentennial in 1976 was a biggie. So was the Queen's silver jubilee the following year.
You'd expect the golden and diamond celebrations to be clearer in the mind - what with being more recent - but they are much fuzzier. Mugs and sovereigns for the kids, Brian May at the top of Buck House, Brian Wilson control-freaking it over the party at the palace crowd for the gold; a sodden river pageant and its dire television coverage, Gary Barlow, the Madness Our House light show and the Duke in hospital for the diamond.
You can have too many parties and pick up too many stray balloons and damp flags to maintain enthusiasm for another shindig round the corner.

What do you remember about 2005 and the bicentenary of Nelson's victory at Trafalgar? Do you know or care what has been planned for next year to mark the 200th anniversary of Wellington's victory over Napoleon at Waterloo? Or  if anything is in the pipeline for October next year to mark the 600th anniversary of our archers' success against the odds at Agincourt ? (One imagines that people were too busy worrying about the Western Front to have concerned themselves with jollities for the 500th.)

Yesterday the country was apparently united in remembrance of the boys sent to their deaths in the high summer of 1914. Boys sacrificed because the whole of Europe had taken up such intransigent positions and mobilised forces to such an extent that the Queen's grandfather and his two cousins had little choice but to wage war with each other, once Gavrilo Princip  obligingly fired the starting gun.

A hundred years on, against the distant clamour of neighbour fighting neighbour and brother fighting brother in Israel, Syria and Ukraine, we heard the sirens of platitude from European leaders, a solemn celebration of peace and lessons learnt.

The Press, too, dutifully fell into line;  backbenches vying to produce the starkest front page, the most evocative headline. 
"The world remembers" proclaimed the Times wraparound - untruthfully, for this was essentially a European weep-in. There were pictures from London, Belfast, Balmoral, Liege, Mons - and  Afghanistan, because we still have troops there.
And against what background was this sombre sentiment set? A picture of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, who could  as well have been heading across the grass to a country church wedding as to a  memorial service. 
The tell-tale gravestones were safely at the back of the wrap; the far more evocative picture - Paul Kingston's photograph of a Second World War veteran saluting a statue of a First World War tommy -  kept inside.

The Sun had Prince Harry looking noble above the heading "Harry's hero", and the Mail almost hit the jackpot with Kate and Harry - if only the Archbishop of Canterbury hadn't been in the foreground. 
It wasn't only the royals on  front-page duty: the unknown soldier was pressed into service again, with a lone candle on the tomb at Westminster Abbey, while young men dressed in early 20th century uniforms and a shower of poppies provided the Express and Star with their cover pictures.

There is, of course, no one left who served in the war, no one left who remembers the individuals who died. But we can create the illusion with photographs of old soldiers from other conflicts. Royalty with heads bowed, old men with campaign medals pinned to misshapen blazers, Chelsea pensioners, and Beefeaters among the Tower of London poppies are all brought into play.
[Paul Cummins's installation which will eventually have more than 888,000 ceramic poppies is, incidentally, the most imaginative, moving and spectacular memorial of all. SubScribe has been surprised by the limited space devoted to it in the papers so far, but Wills, Kate and Harry went to see it today, so it will no doubt figure prominently tomorrow.]
Tower of London poppies installation
Photo credit: Historic Royal Palaces
Those boys of a hundred years ago who thought they were fighting for King and country, for a great cause, did they want to be remembered like this - as characters in a giant act of enforced national breast-beating; their personal letters to their mums read out to the world?
If they believed they were engaged in the war to end all wars, what would they think of the symbolism of a prince wearing medals celebrating his grandma's longevity on the throne  carrying a lamp around a Belgian field while hundreds of his contemporaries adjust to life without the arms and legs blown off by roadside bombs in Iraq and Afghanistan?
What would they think if they knew that far from "learning the lessons" of the Great War,  their country would go on to send nearly half a million more young men and women to die in a score of conflicts all over the world; that not a year would go by in the following century without British troops being involved in combat somewhere?

Of course we should honour the fallen. Of course we should remember and acknowledge the day that set the world on such a bloody path. But these events don't feel real, they don't seem heartfelt and instinctive. This is orchestrated homage and we are in danger of wallowing in this sea of reverence as we did in that ocean of sentimentality after the death of Diana. 

That initial spontaneous show of respect by the people of (now Royal) Wootton Bassett was the real deal, but it turned into a ritual and then a tourist attraction, until the town was finally swamped.
We appear to have an unerring ability to take a pure moment and reduce it to a source of entertainment, an occasion to publish a souvenir supplement, to snipe at a politician over the wording on his wreath or to assess the fashion sense of the lesser royals.

There will be many sad centenaries over the next four years - of  the Easter Rising and the Russian revolution as well as the Great War. We shall also see the 70th anniversaries of VE Day, of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, of VJ day, the 60th anniversary of Suez, the 20th anniversary of the Good Friday agreement.

Would it not be good if these could be marked with restraint and respect, rather than as an opportunity to sell a book, plug a television series or give away a free bone china thimble (plus p&p, collect the whole set for £25).
Times inside wrap
The photograph inside the Times wrap, by Paul Kingston
3 Comments

A royal baby that isn't and the exclusives that aren't

13/4/2014

0 Comments

 
For Kate's bump, read Kate's bumpy ride.
If you had suffered morning sickness as badly as the Duchess of Cambridge did when she was expecting Prince George, would you go bouncing down the river in a jet boat?
If you were regarded as an international role model for motherhood, would you be photographed drinking wine when pregnant?
I think we can assume that the Duchess will not be producing a sibling for George within the next nine months.
Yet this morning the Star has a white-on-purple ROYAL WORLD EXCLUSIVE above the splash heading  "Wills: baby no2 is on the way". 

kate winetasting
On the way, that is, in the sense of perhaps there'll be another baby sometime. There is no attempt to hold up the  "Kate's expecting"  pretext  conveyed by the heading beyond the front page. 
The third of the three pars on page 1 says: "It's the clearest clue yet that Wills and Kate are already trying for a brother or sister for eight-month-old George".
The hint came in a remark the Prince made to a woman who made a shawl for George: "You might have to make another one soon" - and the "soon" is disputed. 


Eight words are enough to drive Fleet Street into a frenzy.  Far from being exclusive - as the Express, Mirror and People also claimed - the "story" appears almost everywhere. Only the Independent on Sunday and Observer ignore it. Kate is the front-page picture for the Telegraph and Sunday Times - and both refer to the hint in their captions. 


In the end, they all accept that the most they've got is a hint. So why go so far over the top with the headlines? And why claim as exclusive a story that patently isn't? If Kate had been pregnant and the Star had got the story to itself, would it have diluted the front page with the promise of a free box of Maltesers and four other puffs (one of which points to yesterday's Sun splash)?
If it was exclusive, why did the Mirror make its readers wait until pages 14-15 for the story, the Express to page 5 and the People to pages 12-13? 
Hats off here to the Sun, which didn't even make it a page lead, but used it as a picture story on 15.


The Independent on Sunday may shun the royals, but it, too, comes a cropper on the exclusive front. Its splash on GPs is shared with the Telegraph, and its leak from the UN's latest climate report is not only shared with the Observer, which leads on the story, but less detailed and doesn't even include its title. It's a shame, because the paper is looking good in spite of its shortage of resources.

People front 13-04-2014
The People boasts of an exclusive not only on the baby that isn't, but also on Peaches Geldof and on its splash "Violent rages of Costa killer".
(By the way, the quotes are not necessary on the word killer, since Mayka Kukucova has admitted shooting the so-called King of Bling Andy Bush, but claims that she was acting in self-defence).
In this story Bush's 19-year-old daughter Ellie describes Kukocova as obsessively jealous, like a child who couldn't control her anger. Nick Dorman reports that on a shopping trip Kukocova had been upset that Bush wouldn't buy her things she wanted. “She went into a blind rage, screaming and threw a handbag at him.  She did it to purposefully hurt him and then stormed off. We didn’t see her for a few hours, it was a common thing.”
 “She stamped all over his laptop, then put it underneath a tap and put it back in the case. When we got back to England he realised but he tried to ignore it. He thought he could change her."

mail ellie bush
But look here, at pages 24-25 of the Mail. Ben Ellery in Spain and Nick Craven in London write about Ellie Bush and her opinion of Kukucova. She's like a child, apparently, and can't control her anger. There was a shopping trip and a thrown handbag, and a laptop held under a tap. And it's not only the quotes that are  virtually identical: both papers illustrate the story with the same photograph - although the Mail flips its version (naughty!) 
If this was a catch-up job, it was a supremely slick operation even by the Mail's high standards.

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Kate's wedding outfit: an editing faux pas?

1/4/2014

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Kate's coat
The Mirror, Times,Telegraph and Mail, below, all suggested that Sarah Baillie was somehow at fault
So another guest at the Lucy Meade-Charlie Budgett nuptials turned up in the same coat as the Duchess of Cambridge. This, according to the Mirror, Mail, Telegraph and Times, was a fashion faux pas. Why?
It's not as though she turned up in bridal white complete with freesias and train. How was Sarah Baillie supposed to know what Kate would be wearing? Had the Duchess posted a status update on her Facebook page "Digging out the old blue tweed for Lucy's bash"? 
At least the Mirror came up with an amusing headline.
Just in case you commit the unforgiveable social error of appearing at morning conference in the same pink Ben Sherman shirt as the editor, here is the SubScribe etiquette to cover the faux pas. When you see he's spotted the clash, feign surprise and look down at yourself and up at him with a sheepish or conspiratorial smile (depending on the boss). 

Mail diary on Kate's coat
Then say "Snap!" and compliment yourself on your own good taste. 
If he doesn't notice that you are similarly attired, you can be sure that your "friends" will, so there will be post-conference ribbing. 

Just act suave. After all, you can't help being a style icon.
If, on the other hand, you rock up in the purple Ted Baker number that she's been wearing for the past couple of years, that is a career faux pas and there's no hope for you. Best not to mention the TK Maxx clearance rail.
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A touch of class from the Mirror

19/2/2014

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mirror headline
The Buckingham Palace reception to celebrate the Queen's 60 years as patron of RADA produced three front-page pictures yesterday.
The Telegraph and Mail chose the best one, in which the Queen seems to be curtseying  to a finger-wagging Dame Helen Mirren. (Could she be telling Her Majesty that she's too old for life-saving drugs?)
Everyone has further pictures inside, and it's all a bit lame. 
Mirren tells Kate how to be Queen, in the Mail,
"A Palace of stars to celebrate the Queen's 60 years of backing the arts" (Telegraph), "A starry, starry night at Palace" (Express)

 And then there's this in the Mirror.  
A bit of designer detail, a bit of imagination and a true touch of class


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    Liz Gerard

    Liz Gerard

    New year, new face: it's time to come out from behind that Beryl Cook mask. 
    I'm Liz Gerard, and after four decades dedicated to hard news, I now live by the motto "Those who can do, those who can't write blogs". 
    These are my musings on our national newspapers. Some of them may have value.

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